I used to be afraid that I had irreparably destroyed my chance at being a leader of God's people. I was nearing the end of my college career (finishing a ministry degree). I had just left a church in disgrace, after my secret life of sin blew up in my face and went public. And I had little to no faith that anyone would ever trust me again.
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| Photo courtesy of Mommamia at Flickr.com |
Hitting rock bottom
It was a pretty rocky patch in my life. Some might call it my rock bottom. My hope was at an all time low, and my weakness at it's highest ever. I understood that God was strong enough to save me from myself, my biggest problem was I didn't believe he wanted to. But for some reason, I had hope of having hope. And on the darkest night of my life, I prayed what was perhaps the first honest prayer I ever prayed. I simply said, "Jesus, please don't give up on me."
Shortly after that night, I learned something new. It was something I had heard before, but it stood out in a whole new way. They are the words written by the apostle Paul, regarding some anonymous infirmity he was given to keep him humble.
"Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, my strength is made perfect in weakness.'" - 2 Corinthians 12:8-9
After I learned that, it just seemed like God interested in redeeming a number of seedy characters other than me. Even Paul admits, in a later letter, that he considers himself to be the worst among all sinners. But even outside of the ancient stories of the Bible, God seemed to be doing amazing work redeeming people all over the place.
A couple of God's great worst men
Caleb, the pastor who showed me the ropes of ministry and officiated my wedding, led another life before ministry where he was a skinhead. He ran with a crowd that got it's kicks from assaulting other people because of the color of their skin. He's told me about the incredible consequences that his lifestyle had on his family, and what it eventually took to get away from it.
Today, God is using Caleb to transform people to impact their world for Christ. He preaches like most pastors, he does marriage counseling and all that other stuff too. But what really sets Caleb apart from other pastors is the wisdom that God has given him with regards to uniting ministry teams and driving them toward a specific goal.
Drew Arliskas is the Senior Pastor of Mountain Vista Bible Church. Aside from battling his own struggle with addiction, Drew's relationships were haunted by his tendency to objectify women.
Today, Drew is one of the most compassionate and loving father's I know. God has more than redeemed his view of women. In a recent phone conversation, Drew told me, "Before I was a Christian they (women) were an object, after they were fellow human beings made in the image of God."
Guys like Caleb and Drew are proof that God is in the business of renewal. As God began to pull me out of the gutter of my life, He used these guys and others just like them to show me how much He cares about each and every one of us.
I continually thank God for the way that he used the weaknesses of my friends to make His love loud enough that even I could hear it. He used their stories, and the stories of other guys like them to show me that I could ditch the secret life of sin, and He would even work through my weakness to help others. While that's not a reason to sin all the more, it is a reason to celebrate because God can redeem anyone, especially people with great weaknesses.
These are examples of just a few guys that really impacted me, but what about you. Who has really impacted you over the years? Please join the conversation in the comment section below.
Thanks for reading,
Tim H. Swanson
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