Unrelenting, Heartstopping, Sheer Terror!!

by Tim Swanson

The day was beautiful beyond words. Fluffy white clouds wandered through the sky above our heads. A mild breeze moved the tree branches about and made a calming 'swishing' sound. Surrounded by white capped mountains on every side, we were four days away from civilization on the path to the Pindari Glacier in the Himalaya mountains. The pain in our feet was of little concern to us as we stared at the majesty of God's creation.

The Team in front of the Pindari Glacier.

We walked through thick patches of lush greenery and past streams of crystal clear water during our days of travel. At one point, our path led us through a massive meadow on a west facing mountain slope. I stopped next to one of my fellow trekkers to admire the scenery. The meadow was carpeted with ankle high yellow and orange flowers sprinkled with tiny yellow fluttering butterflies. With all of it's magnificence, this place evoked pure serenity.

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" The shrill scream cut through the air of the meadow as a young lady in our group ran full speed across the plane. Her pack, which was almost bigger than she was, swung from side to side nearly knocking her to the ground as she trampled the flowers. My fellow trekker and I stood still. Only our heads moved to follow the young lady who ran as if she were on fire.

Along the way we ran into a shepherd.

It's called Lepidopterophobia. It is the irrational fear of butterflies (and moths). I had never heard of it before the trek, but this phobia had my full attention as I watched the young lady run clear through the meadow and on until she was out of sight. While my friend and I took in everything those mountains had to offer and stood in awe of creation, she was blind to all of it. To her there was only one thing on that mountain side - butterflies. Her fear of those tiny winged creatures overshadowed everything else. She overlooked all of the splendor of that place because of tiny indifferent bugs that couldn't even hurt you if they wanted to.

It sounds silly to me that something so small had so much influence in her life. But as I've reflected on that day I've come to an unnerving conclusion: I do the same thing! If I'm really honest, fear permeates just about every area of my life. Last night before I went to bed, I took inventory of the places where fear influences my day. I realized that fear is part of every waking moment for me. When I drive, I worry about how my driving looks to other drivers. At work, I worry about making bad decisions, offending people, falling behind, looking inept, etc. At home I worry about failing in my marriage, letting my children down, letting my wife down, and much much more. I could go on for quite some time. When I started writing this, I thought the fear of butterflies was silly. And now, if I could trade all of my fears for one irrational fear of butterflies, I would do it in a heartbeat.

A photo of the lush greenery

How about you? How does fear influence your life? Maybe you don’t give fear any power over you. If that’s the case then you should find someone who has lots of fear and rub off on them. But if you’re more like me, then fear is overpowering. While I have not conquered my fears, I have made some real progress in the last few years that I didn’t think was possible. So now I’d like to give you three basic steps to begin approaching your fear. These things have been the only steps that have worked for me, and a lot of other people I’ve come to know.

1. Pray. At this point you may be saying, “Tim, that’s your answer for everything.” You’re dang straight it is. And it should be yours too. Specifically, pray for wisdom. In James 1:2-8, James tells the newly formed church to consider their trials as joy. That may sound like a stupid suggestion, I know it did to me at first. But that is not James’ suggestion, he proposes joy as a goal. The idea is that we look at the things that scare us as opportunities to grow and learn, and when we get excited about that kind of growth, then trials can produce joy. And he doesn’t leave us without tools to accomplish the goal. In verse 5 he says, “If anyone lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given to him.” Prayer will never steer you in the wrong direction.

2. Invest in Sympathetic Community. I know a lot of people who have done well trusting 12 step programs, I am one of those people. Another excellent community to pursue is the church. I realize that these communities can be a scary proposition for a lot of people. They probably should be, they’re full of imperfect people. But that is not a reason to do away with them all together. You’ll find the same hypocritical, judgmental, narrow minded people at church, work, clubs, bars, gyms, or anywhere else you go. The idea is not that these places will save you, only Jesus does that. But as you meet new people you’ll build fond memories and difficult ones at the same time. Only, when you go into these places with wisdom from God, you’ll even find joy in the difficult memories because they will produce valuable lessons.

3. Find Yourself A Trusted Adviser. Trusting people can be really scary. But it would be foolish for us to let our fear of other people rule the day. There is no shame in wading slowly into scary waters. What I do is look for someone who has something I want. Then I ask him/her how to get it. Today I have several excellent advisers. My wife is my only female advisor. She is a good one for me because she sees areas that tend to be my blind spots. I can always get some insight by asking her opinion. I also have a sponsor through my 12 step program. He is a guy who has dealt with similar fears to mine and has experienced the kind of success that I want. My father is another one of my trusted advisers. I am a lot like him, and he is a lot older than me. Going to him is almost like looking into my future in many ways. He has experienced a lot of the potholes that may be ahead of me. So when he gives advice, I usually listen. You may not have any relationships like these to build on. If that’s the case, then start by looking for just one. This person could be a manager or boss at work, a leader at your church, a reputable member of your community, a long standing family friend. Whoever it is for you, I recommend the same simple process that was given to me: look for someone who has what you want, and ask him/her how to get it.

Fear is cunning, baffling and powerful. As you pursue your goals, it may be the one thing that’s holding you back. If that is the case then take heart. It may have the advantage, but it’s not invincible. And you have the most powerful tool on your side - The one and only All Powerful God who loves you very much.