3 Ways To Quiet The Negative Voices In Your Head

by Tim H. Swanson

When I was in elementary school, I asked Jenna Robinson if she would be my girlfriend. She was standing next to her friends on the playground during recess. She didn't say anything, she just laughed - right in my face. So did all her friends. That day, a voice was born in my head. It said, “Ouch, that hurt. You’d better not let that happen again.” At first I thought the voice was there to protect me. And every time I’d get hurt or make a mistake, new voices were born that came with new warnings and different things to say. Eventually they started telling me things like, “You should play it safe. Don’t overestimate yourself.” Then the voices went beyond cautiousness. They began to get nasty.

Today the voices in my head that say the most awful things. They whisper mean and abusive words like, "You don't have what it takes." And when I think about God's calling on my life to connect people with Him through music and inspire other leaders through writing and mentoring, the voices say, "Ha! You can’t be serious. Who's going to listen to you? There are people who are can do all that stuff. You're not one of them. You’re going to waste your time." My voices are articulate and convincing. They're difficult to argue with.

I bet you have them too, don't you? I haven't met a person yet that doesn't have a few nasty voices whispering negativity in their ear. They're louder for some than others, but they all have the same thing to say. They want you to think twice, take a step back, and follow your fears. But that's not how God created us to live. He tells us that He didn't create is with a spirit of fear but of power, love and self control (2 Timothy 1:7). So all you have to do is live from that place of strength. Easier said than done though, right?

When you began your relationship with Jesus, he didn't change out your spirit like a guitar string, cutting if the broken one and slapping a new one on there. He works on our broken spirits slowly. It's a process that requires time and work, more like tuning a piano. God wants us to take hold of the spirit of power, love and self discipline, but it takes work in our part to build that new spirit within us. These are the things I have learned from people older and wiser than myself about dealing with the voices of discouragement.

1. Spend a little time with your Dad. I have three kids. At no point world I ever want any of them to believe a lie about themselves. If I found out my daughter came to believe a nasty lie about herself, I'd work hard to let her know the truth - that she is amazing, and special, and she has the potential to accomplish more than she can imagine. It's the same way with God and you. He wants to let you know how incredible you are. He wants to tell you that He thinks you're so amazing that he has your name tattooed on his hands  (that's in the Bible, but I'll let you look it up. Here's a hint, its in Isaiah 49). Go to your Heavenly Father in prayer and reading of Scripture. That'll shoot down those negative voices.

2. Write them out. At first my voices tried to protect me from danger. That's logical seeming. Now, they don't want me to try anything for fear of failure. That's not logical at all. In his book, Start, Jon Acuff talks about why the voices speak, “They only get loud when you do work that matters”. He goes on to show how writing down the lies can help you see them through a new lens, a rational lens. You’ll see the lies for what they are. If you’re feeling especially bold, fold up the piece of paper with your lies and burn it. That will help you symbolically purge your mind of bad thoughts, and create some space for the truth that God wants to fill your brains with.

3. Tell it. This one is powerful. Tell someone you trust what your voices say, and let them tell you how ridiculous you are. They say, “no one ever changed their mind because they lost the argument”, which may be true when it comes to a person’s spiritual belief. But when it comes to inner discouragement, you may begin to see the light when a friend lovingly tells you you’re out of your mind. Even if feel hopeless and are committed to believing untruths about yourself, the friend you tell may just have battled with the same thing. He/she may be able to show you the next step to take to gain some insight.

I’ve been fighting with my voices this week. They’ve been telling me that God doesn’t want to work through me. They say I will never amount to much, and that I will fail at everything I do. Recently, I was even questioning whether I should continue writing. Then last night my son wasn’t sleeping.I was up walking him around the house I began to pray. I asked God about my future, and about his future, and what God wanted to provide. I asked Him if my voices were right, and maybe it was time to scale back and give up on some things. Today I was reminded that God didn’t create me to live fearfully. He created me to connect people with God through music and inspire other leaders through writing and mentoring.

What are your voices telling you? What is the truth they don’t want you to see?