Facing the recent criticism on my blog. And how to respond to criticism wherever it pops up.

This may come as a surprise, but occasionally people will read my blog and disagree with the things I write. Gasp! I know. And some of those people have been leaving comments to let me know how much they disagree with me. Wanting to be respectful to my commenters, I won't point specific ones out in this post. Instead, I'll simply acknowledge the types of criticism that have been I've seen.

Photo of adorable cats courtesy of Found Animals Foundation on Flickr.com

The recent criticisms that have popped up on Timhswanson.com have been in response to some of my family leadership posts, and the ideas in those post. But regardless of where criticism come from , or where it's directed, there are only two kinds of criticism. There's constructive criticism, which seeks to inform and educate you on how you can do better. And then there's good ol' regular criticism, which simply voices disagreements without any concern for being helpful.

Recently I've received comments containing both kinds of criticism. Some of it seems to be well placed and constructive. And some of it seems less than constructive. The hard part about it is that criticism is painful.

Even constructive criticism, if intentionally worded, can be needlessly hurtful. And while we all experience criticism from time to time, the truth is, criticism only serves to put the ball in our court by giving us a chance to respond. So as I continue working to discover more potential in my life, I'm faced with the challenging question - how will I respond to criticism?

Like you, I've seen people respond to criticism in lots of different ways. I've watched people blow up at each other in response to criticism. And more frequently, I've witnessed people who respond with bitter resentment that they hold deep inside themselves. In any case, I would not want to replicate most of what I've seen.

The scary truth about all criticism
The thing that makes criticism so scary is we worry that it's true. And critical remarks typically are true, or contain at least some truth. Even when when someone really lets you have it and makes all kinds of accusations about you, there is almost always a pellet truth somewhere in their words.

But the reality is - true criticism is nothing to be afraid of. It brings our character defects to light, giving us a chance to work on them. Even if 90% of a person's criticism toward you is wrong, there's almost always an opportunity to own up to something, and work to overcome it.

In the end, we shouldn't be scared of criticism, we should welcome it with gratitude. Acknowledging the truth gives us the chance to grow and become better people. And imagine how the amount of conflict in our lives would be decreased if we earnestly acknowledged people's words, and thanked them for the chance to work on our stuff.

The best way to respond to all criticism. 
Whether you're able to find any truth in incoming criticism or not, there's only one thing that matters. If you want to discover more potential in your life, then consider the following quote from the Bible. The Apostle Paul writes to a young church saying, "If I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, but have not love, I am nothing." (1 Corinthians 13:2)

You and I could realize our full potential in life, but if we do not have love, our full potential is worthless. For that reason, the only logical way to respond to any criticism is in love. It can be a challenge, but it's a worthy one to be sure.

Responding to criticism with love is a powerful strategy. It allows us to maintain relationships, while facing criticism of various types. And when we display a capacity for great love, it can go a long way toward melting the anger that our character defects can evoke.

Disclaimer: This certainly doesn't mean that we're called to face ceaseless criticism at the hands of an angry or vengeful person. That's called abuse. And if someone is abusing you, you should set boundaries to distance yourself from the person. Though, in as much as it's possible, boundaries should be set in love. 

Connecting all the dots
Criticism on the internet is no different than criticism at work, home or anywhere else. And the response to it is the same as well. Nothing less than genuine self searching and a loving response will do.

When it comes to criticism on my blog, I want to make those two things my standard for response. I'm grateful for the people who have given me their honest feedback. It's already helping me improve your reading experience. And my hope is that it will continue to.

But what about you? Are you good at handling criticism or is it more work for you? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below.

Thanks for reading,
Tim