What you say to Christians who get all uppity about avoiding the Xmas abbreviation

Ever meet one of those people who says stuff like, "I hate it when they write Xmas instead of Christmas. They're trying to take Jesus right out of the holiday!" Ever wonder how to respond to those people?

Photo courtesy of Kat N.L.M. at Flickr.com

Well take heart. There's a good reason for the abbreviation. And it has nothing to do with Christmas originating from a pagan holiday if that's what you're thinking. The reality is, the Xmas abbreviation is a lot more Christ honoring than most people know.

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We should be calling pastors out on these deadly sins

I probably don't need to tell you that pastors aren't perfect. Like anyone else, they're fundamentally flawed. Of course, they faith that Jesus loves them and has forgiven them. And hopefully God uses their faith as an example for hurting people in their community each week. But what about the pastors who are regularly committing the sins that they're warning everyone else to avoid?

Photo courtesy of Joseph Rose at Flickr.com

If a pastor is on the right track, he's following God's plan for his life. And, while he isn't perfect, he looks for opportunities to reject selfishness and become more like Jesus. But if he's on the wrong track, even in the little things, he has given selfishness a foothold which can shipwreck his faith (1 Tim. 1:19).

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My embarrassing one on one with baseball celeb Louis Gonzales proves my blog is already successful!

This is a little embarrassing to admit, but I do not understand sports. Not even a little. When other guys stand around talking about how many touchdowns the Cowboys got last week, I'm the guy that's like, "Touchdowns, that's football right?" I'm not even exaggerating. It's that bad.

So obviously I wouldn't be familiar with any sports celebrities like, oh say, Luis Gonzalez, who (from what I'm told) hit a game winning single that broke 2-2 tie with the New York Yankees and won the World Series for the Diamondbacks in 2001. That's a pretty amazing fact, and one I wish I was antiquated with before I met him.

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The truth about men and singing that sent a chill up my spine [Video]

"How many of you believe that singing in church is for pansies?" That's the question I asked at the last men's breakfast at my church. To their credit, about half of them were honest enough to raise their hands. But it highlights a problem among Christian men in the West. By and large, we believe singing is for women.

Photo courtesy of Christian Ostrosky at Flickr.com

Pastors and worship leaders, like myself, try to explain to men why they are supposed to sing. We quote verses that say things like, "Serve the Lord with gladness, come into his presence with singing!" (Psalm 100:2) Sometimes we even try to connect them with a song by telling a touching story that's designed to tug on their heart strings. But They're not biting. And at the end of the day, most worship leaders have the same problem - it's difficult to get most men to sing during worship services.

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The 7 Trendiest New Kinds Of Parking Spaces For Your Church's Parking Lot

The parking lot at your church is a really important part your guest's experience on Sunday morning. It's where people first get a sense of what's really important to the people at your church.

Photo courtesy of Lucien Looser at Flickr.com

In recent years, lots of churches have been more intentional about creating parking that caters to the church's most valued persons. Most churches have included a number of guest parking spots near the entrance to their buildings, which is a great way to say Hey, we value our guests! And even more recently, churches are including special parking for expectant mothers. A friend of mine told me about a church here in Phoenix that even has spots designated for family parking.

The other day I was sitting in a staff meeting, talking about this very issue, and it got me thinking - If our parking spaces help us communicate our values with our guests, why don't we have special parking for the other important people groups within the church? Here are 7 types of parking spaces that you should consider adding to your church parking lot.

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Four Questions To Clarify Your Church's Vision

A church without vision is a lot like a car without a steering wheel. It can look, sound and even smell good, but you'd never invest in it.

If you want to go anywhere, you've got to have a good vision. And if you want to accomplish anything, you need one that comes directly from the imaginative mind of God. But what do you do if your vision isn't clear?

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3 Spiritual Barometers Your Visitors Are Using This Christmas

I once met a young lady who told me she didn’t like God or church. When she was younger she attended the youth group at her parent’s church. Like a lot of teenages, she struggled to feel like she fit in. One evening, after a youth service, she go into it with another girl. In response to the conflict, the other girl spit in her face. That was the last time she attended church. After that night, she painted church, faith and God with the same brush.

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How to Overcome Social Anxiety

I ducked out of the conference session a few minutes before the lunch break, so I could get my vehicle and avoid the traffic (something I hate when people in my congregation do). I exited the front doors of The Rock church, in San Diego and began walking down the sidewalk.

As I shuffled past the side door to the church’s auditorium, Mark Driscoll and Francis Chan walked out together, presumably chatting about how cool it is to be super famous. I stopped dead in my tracks. My heart rate jumped up about 20 beats per minute, and I assume all the blood in my body rushed to my mouth because it opened and began to produce noise.

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The Take Part Worship Conference Is Coming: Tickets Are Now Available!

For the last few months, my team has been working with Worship!Arizona to interview worship leaders. We've discovered that worship leaders and their teams almost never get to focus on just leading worship during church services. Nearly every person we talked to wears multiple hats at their church, and nobody was exempt from battling everyday life challenges. We designed The Take Part Worship Conference to give you tools that will help you manage your various hats and other distractions to get you back to what you love about leading worship - participating in your relationship with God.

• Do worship services produce more stress than release for you? 

• Does service planning take so much time that you hardly have any left for personal worship?

• Do extra responsibilities make it hard for you to focus while you're leading worship?

If any of these made you say 'yes', this conference is for you. The Take Part Conference is a day of worship and hands-on workshops designed to help you navigate extra responsibilities (Stage Design, Audio, Visuals, Rehearsals, Service Programming, etc.) that can turn into a distraction for you, and in turn your team and your church during services.

If you register before January 15th, you'll get pre-registration pricing on tickets for you and your team. 

Who Should Attend?

The Take Part Conference attracts worship leaders and their teams who want to take their congregation to a place of intimate worship, but battle with distraction. 

We're expecting a sold out conference with worship leaders and their team members including:

• Worship Leaders
• Instrumentalists
• Vocalists
• Audio Technicians
• Video Technicians
• Visual Technicians
• Set Design/Construction Team Members
• Service Programming Team Members
• Songwriters
• Other Fine Arts Team Members

Who Will Be Speaking?

This heart focusing worship conference features some of the brightest and most experienced minds in our worship community. These are worship and ministry leaders who, like you, work week after week to create church services that connect the hearts of their church family with God. But most importantly, during the conference they'll share their experience and successes with you. These are just a few of the speakers we have lined up.

• Jeff Merry - Worship Pastor of more than 25 years. He is the founder of Worship!Arizona and WorshipNet.org. He has mentored and coached countless worship leaders, pastors and other church volunteers.

• Tracy Williams - The Director of Worship Bands, Jazz Band and Guitar Studies at Arizona Christian University. Tracy has traveled the world playing guitar for Ray Charles, Jay Leno, Al Green, Bob Hope, and many others. 

• John Peterson - Worship Pastor and various other pastoral roles for more than 20 years. He has spent his career leading worship for churches all over the country. 

• The Arizona Christian University Public Relations Worship Team - It's not a fancy name, but this praise team is made up of students who dedicate their lives and educations to worshipping God. They'll be leading worship for the conference.

And of course I'll be speaking too. I'll be giving a keynote during one of the main sessions and working to make your experience outstanding. 

Where Will It Be Held?

A huge stressor for many worship leaders is the limitations of our facilities. Some of us have to set up and tear down every week, others have ancient buildings that are falling apart. Nearly all of us struggle, in one way or another, with the limitations of space.

For that reason we're holding the Take Part Conference at my home church, Moon Valley Bible Church. I want the opportunity to show you the innovative ways that my team members work to overcome the issues posed by working along side other ministries and organizations that use our sanctuary, and the frustrations that come with having old buildings that seemingly work against us. 

Moon Valley Bible Church (Click here for a map)

16207 N. 3rd Ave

Phoenix, AZ 85023

Why Should You Attend?
All the session will be focused on how to create the worship experience that removes distractions so you, your team, and your church can connect with God. You'll walk away from the day with new relationships with other worship leaders, practical advice for improving your worship environment, and a list of ideas for how to remove distractions and take worship at your church to the next level. 

Question: What is the number one struggle you face on a weekly basis as you plan for worship?

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The Team Woobie

Tim H. Swanson

Do you remember Linus from Charlie Brown? He's the one who never went anywhere without his blue blanket. It was his constant companion. His whole sense of security was tied up in his relationship with his woobie. He held on to it long after he should have grown out of it. Even in the face of his friends telling him it was time to move on, Linus would declare, "I need my blanket!"

The woobie is a beautiful thing - when you're an infant. But as babies grow into children, security blankets will eventually begin to hinder a child's development. Their connection to a security blanket will actually keep them from learning important skills for handling hurt and frustration.Now, this may surprise you, but some leaders have woobies on their teams. Many have them without even realizing it.

About a year and a half ago, at a lunch for worship leaders, one young lady told the story of her drummer. Her and her husband had become friends with this drummer and his wife. But over time the drummer's performance began to slip. He started showing up later and later for rehearsals. It was also evident that he was spending less time preparing. She went on to explain that her conversations with him had yielded little change in his behavior, and it was starting to affect the rest of the team. There was frustration in her voice as she explained everything, and told the other worship leaders she felt like she was out of moves. She knew the guy was bad for the team, but she felt a sense of responsibility to him as a spiritual leader and didn’t want to cut him loose.

Recently, I called that worship leader back to ask her how the situation with her drummer turned out. She told me she kept him on the team for a while after that meeting. Before long he was simply not showing up for services on Sunday morning. She described an ‘ah ha’ moment when she realized the team was actually better off with no drummer than they were trying to work with him. Soon after, she stopped involving him as a drummer on the church’s praise team.

When you care for the people on your team, it can be difficult to gauge when someone has moved from helper to hinderance. Even when it’s easy to recognize a problem person on the team, any good leader knows that moving a team member to the chopping block isn’t always the best move, and certainly not a move to make hastily.

Sometimes people on our teams drop the ball only after they find their lives in shambles. Other times, they’re simply in the middle of learning an important life lesson that serves as a momentary disatraction. So it’s essential to lead with compassion when it comes to seemingly troubled team members. Often a careful and respectful approach will go a long way to restore people who might just be in need of some understanding. But on occasion, a team member will present a consistent problem compounded by an unteachable attitude. When that happens, it’s the leader’s job to take action. That’s not easy when you care for the people on your team. But the worse thing would be to do nothing, and continue to carry your woobie around. Quickly that person will set the standard for the rest of the team.

If you think you might have a team woobie, here are some good steps that I’ve used and seen leaders use to not only restore their team’s health, but lovingly confront people who are seem to be taking away more than they’re giving..

1. Confront an issue before you become a problem. A person with a bad attitude and an unteachable heart is dangerous for a team, but a hot tempered leader is ten times worse. A lot of team woobies get a poor shake because their leader will put up with as much as he can until eventually snapping and saying or doing something regrettable. Acknowledge issues early on. You can use a simple question like, “Hey, I noticed you’ve been late a couple of times in the last  week. How’s everything going?” Questions like these do two great things. They show your team members that you care, and they reinforce the standard that the rest of the team relies on to achieve their best.

2. Ask, ask, ask. The story of the worship leader and her drummer begins with the worship leader displaying great wisdom and humility. While gathered at a lunch with other worship leaders, she explained her problem and asked the others if they could shed some light on her situation. There is a wealth of information inside the heads and hearts of the leaders we know. And most of them already want to share their experience with us. All we have to do is take the initiative to ask.

3. Move’em before you lose’em. Even if you have a team member with a terrible and disrespectful attitude, it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s time to send him/her packing. In many cases, a simple shift in position can solve your problem. Maybe your team member has another skill that he or she can utilize within the organization. I once had an electric guitar player who wasn’t a good fit for the Sunday morning praise team, but he was an excellent songwriter. I asked him to join the songwriter’s team and help create new music for the church.

Good leaders care for the individuals on their team. But things get dicey really fast when a leader enables one person to bring down everyone else with destructive behavior. As leaders, we have to have the interest of the whole team in mind, which means giving potentially troublesome people attention - the right kind of attention. Being compassionate, and seeking the best for an individual on your team doesn’t necessarily mean that he/she will continue to be a part of the team. But you can be respectful and caring in confrontation and transition. It’s a good practice that is great for your team.

Question: Did you have a woobie when you were a kid? Was it a blanket or a stuffed animal?

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3 Eras Of Church Music Vital To Sunday Planning

Photo courtesy of Alexanderward12 at Flickr.com

by Tim H. Swanson

How much time do you spend trying to plan music that speak to the beating heart of your congregation?

That's what I do. When I plan services at Moon Valley Bible Church, I look for music that will connect with people on a deep level. I want to bridge the gap between people's heads and hearts. It's about coloring in the dotted line between what they know to be true, and what moves them to act on what they know. The only problem is there are so many different kinds of people in my church that it’s nearly impossible to plan a music that will connect with everybody. A certain portion of my congregation connects really well with hymns. Others think hymns are awful, and they feel like they need something newer to connect with.

It seems to be the age old issue of the worship leader. How do you plan a worship set that will connect with the greatest possible number of people in a very diverse crowd? Some churches resign to the fact that they will never appeal to everybody, and they just look to hit one style. Some keep their choirs and orchestras alive and stick to traditional music. Others feel like it’s time to move on. They put traditional music away, and move to whatever is current. Then there are churches who try to split the difference. They do traditional music during their early services. Then they do modern services later in the day. None of these ideas are wrong. In fact, they paint a beautiful picture of the diversity of the body of Christ. That’s one of the things I love about church music. It presents the beautiful mosaic of personality that exists within the church. Speaking to that beautiful mosaic is one of my favorite things about planning music for the services at my church. When I plan music for services, I frequently look to build a diverse set that speaks to different generations, and engages the greatest possible number of people at once. If you’re anything like me, and you strive for diversity then you’ll want to be aware of the three eras of church music that are essential to speaking to the generational mosaic.

1. Hymns - These are the songs that have stood the test of time. Many of them written before our parents were born, these tunes are typically composed with the lyrical complexity needed to communicate deep theological truths. For most they bring back childhood memories, which could be good or bad. In younger churches, this era of music might be honored best with revitalized versions of these songs that use updated instrumentation and dynamics. Beware, however, of rewriting melodies to these tunes. For many people the melody to Amazing Grace is as sacred as the truth it communicates. I’m not saying it’s right, but that’s the way it is. Change the vital elements of a hymn and you might turn it from a fond memory of God’s truth into a frustrating distraction.

2. Contemporary Songs - These are anything written between 1970 and 2007...ish. These songs are special. They're the ones that a lot of people associate with the beginning of their relationship with Jesus. For most of Generation X these are the true worship tunes. Depending on the makeup of your church body, these might be a very important part of your repertoire. I hear a lot of people say they’re overdone, but don’t throw out good songs like ‘Blessed Be Your Name’. They’re an important part of the makeup of today’s church.

3. Modern Songs - Typically these are any songs written in the last 5 years. They’re the bread and butter of the worship leader who wants to be relevant. They are important because they speak to what matters to people today. If you’ve noticed, a lot of the songs that they’re playing on your local Christian radio station are openly acknowledging people’s brokenness. They are preaching the heart of today’s generation, which is no longer content putting on a smile on Sunday and remain miserable for the rest of the week. These songs speak for the people who want real change. Use them to acknowledge what everyone is thinking.

Every church has a slightly different culture. Which means that the ideal mix of these three will be slightly different for everyone. I’ve found that at my church the right mix is generally 50% Modern, 30% Hymns and 20% Contemporary. That is the mix that best speaks to the heart beat of my church. But what is it at your church? What mix of the three main eras of music is best to speak to the great mixture of people God has entrusted to you?

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5 Ways To Determine Your Church's Culture

by Tim H. Swanson

How does your congregation feel about your music selection? Do you even know, or are you afraid to know? That’s how I’ve felt much of the time. Sometimes people come up to me and tell me they really connect with the music. Other times, people come up and tell me they miss the old worship leader (harsh right?). I like to think those people each represent a broader group of church members.

Sometimes I wonder just how many people from my church connect with the kind of music we do, and how many miss the worship leader before me. Frankly, the idea of knowing that kind of information scares me. It freaks me out to think that people don't like me. Like most people, I want to be liked. And like most musicians, I am terrified of not being liked. I often wish God would just give me the magic recipe for creating music sets that appeal to everyone. The truth is, that kind of wishing just highlights my own selfishness. When I get fixated on pleasing everyone, it’s not because I want to glorify God. It’s because I want to feel okay about who I am. It’s just my own insecurity. Strangely, it’s the same thing that drives me to avoid people’s input about the services. In the same way that I selfishly want people to like me, I’m afraid to find out that they don’t.

Recently, I had a look at my job description. Much to my surprise, the protection of my own reputation appears nowhere on it. Instead, it pretty clearly states that my job is to create an environment where the people of Moon Valley Bible Church can come together and worship God through music. Since my congregation, like yours, is a cross section of different ages and preferences, that means spending some time learning what the people connect with. That means determining the culture of my church. So if you are like me and trying to discover your church’s culture, here are a few good approaches to move you down the path.

1. Become a student of your congregation. I once had a mentor tell me to do this. He instructed me to spend time looking out at the people while I was leading to see what was going on among them. When I did, I learned a lot. I began to learn just how long it took for people to begin singing along with new music. I can see which people sing, and which ones stand their with their hands in their pockets. Some weeks, I get the distinct privilege of watching more people than usual raise their hands, close their eyes, and abandon themselves in worship of their creator. Maybe you’re in the habit of making eye contact with your congregation, but have you ever studied them? If it’s your job to create a place for them to come together and connect with God, shouldn’t you take advantage of an opportunity to just look out and see how things are going? Spend some time from the platform studying your congregation.

2. Spend time among the people. Before the service is great, but after the service is even better. See what’s on people’s mind. At my church, if people are talking about what they learned or how they were challenged then we win. Some of the best preachers I know will even go out into the crowd and ask people what they thought afterward. That’s bold, and it requires guts. But it’s a great way to learn how you can improve. The other week somebody in my congregation called me out by asking, “Why do you dress up when you preach, but not when you lead worship? Do you somehow think you’re more of a public figure when you’re preaching?” #DeerInTheHeadlights. I wisely responded, “I, uh…. well...” Smooth, I know.

3. Gather a cross section of your congregation for regular evaluation. Email addresses are easy to get. So grab the emails of 15 or 20 church members with different ages and life stages. Then draft a simple evaluation and periodically send it to them. My teaching pastor, Bob Kerrey, does this. He doesn’t send it out every week, and it only has three questions. This is an easy way to gather some vital information about your planning. It may not change what kind of material you plan for services, but it may be the thing that helps you see when you’re in a slump.

4. One on one time with new people. What do new people think or your services? When was the last time you asked one? New people have the most valuable thing of all, fresh eyes and ears. While you are consumed with the water stains on the ceiling and how old your carpet is, these people are noticing the things that actually matter. When you see them sitting in one of your seats, go up to them and ask them what they thought. This will give you some fresh perspective.

5. Create regular space for people to give feedback. Make some space on your church’s connection card for people to write their comments about the music during the service. This will give people, who are shy, a safe place to honestly share their thoughts. However beware, things that show up week after week tend to disappear to your regular attenders. This is the type of thing you can do for a week or two every other month, and if you’re feeling brave you can even point it out from the stage.

6. Stereotyping isn’t always bad. Let me start off by saying, that stereotyping can be really destructive, especially if it’s crude and uninformed. But it can do some real good if you are wise about it and understand stereotypes are just generalizations that should be used generally. If you’re church body is predominantly retired, then it is safe to assume they will connect with hymns. If the majority of your church body is people who are returning to church after a long period of time away, it may be safe to assume they have some baggage associated with the church of their youth. In that case, traditional style hymns may not be the best idea.

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I Have A Worship Question... Outreach?

by Tim H. Swanson

How many staff or ministry leadership meetings have you sat through where people get fired up saying things like, “Our church isn’t growing because we’re not reaching out to the community”, “We’ve become too inward -focused”, “We need to begin actually discipling people”. Then, they often have some convenient numbers and statistics to support their points. I've heard lots of these, but after that first little bit I usually have a hard time recounting how the conversation goes because I’ve been in the habit of tuning out after the statistics. It’s not that I disagree with those people. I think they’re right. But, when they start talking about missions and evangelism all I hear is, “Blah blah blah evangelism. Blah blah blah 80% unchurched. Blah blah a bunch of stuff that has nothing to do with music.” By the time they’re done talking I’m either playing Angry Birds or tooling around on ChurchStageDesignIdeas.com.

The issue with these conversations, and the reason I tune out, is not that these fired up people are wrong. It’s that I, like too many others, carry around a bad attitude about outreach. I have a totally jacked up misconception about evangelism. I feel like it’s someone else’s job. When people start talking about sharing the gospel with the unreached, I start looking around to figure out who is supposed to do that. The problem is, when I look around at everybody else, I’m looking in the wrong direction. I should be looking in a mirror.  

After His resurrection, Jesus sat down with His disciples and told them this: "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." But, like me, many Christian leaders today act as if he said, "Okay, I want you to run church services. It doesn't matter who they appeal to. If new people don't come, blame it on the culture. Peter, teach themed sermon series about whatever is relevant. Matthew, I want you to take an offering at the services. John, you can play guitar right? Good. Write some songs about me and make everyone sing them. And this is the most important thing, let the planning of those services consume all of your time. I don't want any of you to have any real relationships outside of those couple hours on Sunday morning." 

As a worship leader, it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that reaching out to nonbelievers is somebody else's job. but that's just not the case. Jesus calls all believers to be witnesses. That includes singers, instrumentalists, tech team members, and most of all the worship leader. As the leader everybody is going to look to you to see how to act. 

If your church is talking about outreach, it has to begin with you, especially if you're a leader. Evangelism takes place in conversations between believers and nonbelievers. You and I need to become the believer in one of those conversations. If you're anything like me and you've developed a bad attitude about outreach, I'd like to simply prompt you to think about your own attitude with a few questions. 

1. Have I been putting the responsibility of outreach on somebody else?


2. Who do I know who doesn't know Jesus?

3. God, will you provide an opportunity for me to tell somebody who doesn't believe about what You've done in my life?

In my church, outreach has to start with me. Like a lot of church leaders, I live inside the Christian bubble. I graduated from a Christian college. I work at a church, which is where my social network is. I even exclusively attend Christian 12 step meetings. But even I have a sold short list of nonbelievers that I can pray for opportunities to share Jesus with. The truth is, anyone with Facebook or an email contacts list knows someone that needs Jesus. If you can't think of anyone right now, don't worry. They're out there. I promise. All we have to do is pray for the opportunity and God will provide. He's good that way.

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Does Your Children's Ministry Have Too Much Sex Appeal?

Photo courtesy of Don Gore (dgdraws) on Flickr.com 

by Tim H. Swanson

You don't even have to call yourself a Christian to know that there has been a huge issue with sexual predators in the church. Catholics get the most headlines for it, but it's no small issue in the protestant church. For a long time predators have used churches with low or no security to begin relationships with kids that they will try to develop into sexual encounters.

I've personally seen it happen. In the last 8 years I've seen about a half dozen churches in my community affected by sexual predators. It's the ugliest thing you can imagine. Families are torn apart. Staff members who neglected proper background checks lose their jobs, and face the guilt that comes with feeling responsible. People go to prison. Churches split. There are massive lawsuits. And worst of all, our children receive life long scars.

Here's the good news. If you don't want this to happen at your church, it doesn't have to. Churches have made some amazing strides in child safety in the last decade. Some of these things cost money. However, never forget, there's not a single investment you can make that's more important than your children's safety. Here are some things you can do to beef up the security around your kids.

1. Enforce check in and check out procedure. Many churches are beginning to have parents write down who can and can’t pick up kids when parents check them in. The safest churches are the ones who enforce this protocol. However, it is important to be clear with guests about the strictness of procedure. The last thing you want to do is turn a safety measure into a bad experience for a newcomer who didn’t understand that both parent’s names have to be on the check out list for Dad to come pick up the kids after the service is over.

2. Eliminate blind spots. These are areas where people can go that are out of sight. If you’re in an older building, your church probably has them. They are created when whole classrooms become storage, or when low traffic areas, like offices and closets, are left unlocked. It’s a very good idea to put locks on rooms where people shouldn’t go during services. But when you do that, you have to go the extra step of making sure they are actually locked.

4. Background checks! It’s kind of a hassle, especially if you have somewhat of a relationship with the people who are volunteering in your children’s ministry. But keep in mind, it’s often not the total stranger who takes advantage of children. The person you need to be weary of is the one they trust.

5. Accountability rocks. It's not always easy to staff a class with two volunteers for children's ministry. If you're running short of volunteers, you can still provide accountability by having leaders sign in and out. A log that shows when volunteers come and go will provide an accountability that's not only safer for your kids but also for volunteers who could be wrongfully accused.

No church no matter how big or small is exempt from the danger that predators present. So let me ask you, how appealing is your church to these people? Does your church go the extra mile for children, or is yours one of the low to no security churches that attracts danger?

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6 Things That May Be Killing Your Church's Growth

by Tim H. Swanson

Does your church hate the idea of growing? I didn't think so. Neither does mine. I bet your church is like my church, and your main goal is to connect people with God, and bring them into a growing relationship with Jesus. If that’s the case, then you already know that that’s no easy task. It’s incredibly challenging and often thankless work, especially when all of the weight is placed on the shoulders of the staff and volunteer leadership.

Good churches rightly understand that the burden of reaching out to the lost is most effective when everybody in the church takes responsibility for his/her part. The churches that grow are the ones who challenge their congregation to invite their friends who don’t already know Jesus. A few months ago, I was in a meeting with one of Saddleback’s founding elders, who told me how they challenge their church family to invite new people.

A few years ago, one of Saddleback’s pastors gathered all of the church’s most committed people in their largest auditorium. Because he only invited the most committed members of the church, their auditorium was nowhere near filled. He asked everyone to spread out,  find their own row and sit down. Once everybody was settled, he had them count the number of chairs in that row. Then the pastor challenged the people to invite enough of their friends to the upcoming Christmas services to fill their row. How does that make you feel? Does it sound a little like a sales pitch? Well it worked. Because of that challenge, Saddleback grew that year. Best of all, people began a life saving relationship with Jesus at their Christmas services. Maybe it feels a little pushy or salesy to think that way. But ask any sales person, they’ll tell you - word of mouth is the most powerful form of advertisement on the planet.

So of course we want our church family to invite their friends. That’s a no-brainer. Maybe your lead pastor has even challenged them, and they haven’t responded. Has your church done that, or have you talked about it in staff meetings? Has your staff brushed it off by trying to blame it on the culture? If so, maybe it’s time to re-examine.

There are a number of reasons church members would hesitate to invite their friends. To understand them, put yourself in their shoes. You’re sitting in a Sunday morning service and the teaching pastor has just challenged you to invite an unchurched friend to a service. My first reaction is fear. I suddenly think, “my unchurched friends are unchurched because they don’t like church. I really don’t want to be one of those people that shoves my beliefs down other people’s throats.” Immediately after that, the next wave of objections floods my mind, “What if my pastor talks about something that makes my friends feel condemned, like premarital sex being evil.” There are a lot of unknowns. It feels risky, and those are just the first hesitations that come to mind. There are many more things for church people to worry about when it comes to inviting their friends.

The truth is, some of their hesitations are made up of fear that they need to work through in their personal relationships with God, which is actually good because that’s the kind of thing that brings about spiritual growth in people. However, a certain amount of it is based on their level of trust in the church. A few months ago, I heard David Kinnamen, owner of the Barna Group, speak at a conference. He said that their research shows a shift in trust between the 1950’s and today. Where church leaders used to be among the most respected and trusted people in society, today the average person trusts the police, doctors, and even nurses more than the pastor in their local church. There’s a reason people have come to think that way. Some of them think the church is evil and full of exclusivist judgmental hypocrites (which is true). Others think that church is a crutch for weak ignorant people. Then there are the people who think church is all about money. Those are just a few types of unchurched people. As you are well aware, there are a lot more. So, when your members begin thinking about who they’ll invite to your next Harvest Festival, or Christmas Eve, or whatever, they quickly become aware of their level of trust, or lack thereof. As church leaders, we have to be aware of this. We have to know that everything we do influences how far our members will trust us.

These are the most significant thing’s I’ve noticed at my church, and other churches I’ve visited that build hesitation in people who are considering inviting a friend.

1. Christianese. Brothers and Sisters, I implore you. Don’t let your tongue become a stumbling block to the lost because - it’s really confusing. Imagine coming to church for the first time, or for the first time in a long time. You already feel like an outsider. One thing that makes it way worse is when the pastor, worship leader, or other stage personality begins using cryptic words that make you feel even more like you don’t belong. When it comes to communication from the stage, our goal should be crystal clear communication that people can understand. When you’re planning for your services, take the time to not only think about what you’re going to say, but how it’s going to be received by the guest.

2. Wrong words appearing on the slides, or the slides being in the incorrect order. Aside from being a huge distraction, the wrong words or the wrong slides does two awful things. First it is a sign that the service planners just don’t care enough to do it correctly. Secondly, if my friend is one who thinks that church is a crutch for weak or ignorant people, mistakes on the screen make my church feel like an unsafe place to bring my friend. Ensuring that the slides have the correct words and are in the correct order is tedious work, but it’s very important. Set aside some time each week to go over the slides and other media. Make sure it’s right. It’s not fun, but it instills confidence in people. If you’re still using Power Point, think about stepping up to software like Easy Worship or ProPresenter. These programs are very easy to edit, and they are designed to have a very low learning curve for new volunteers.

3. Creepy Greeters. Even if your guests were invited by somebody they know well, your front door welcomers are the guest’s first impression of what the people at your church are like. A while back I visited a new church with my family to check it out. I brought my daughter, Scarlett, and my 1 year old son, Silas. Our son was sleeping so we decided to just keep him with us while we went to the service (I know - party fowl). He woke up about half way through, and started preaching his own message. My wife and I quickly got up, and slipped out the side door to the lobby. That was great for us because their church was big enough to have a lobby with a television and live video feed of what was happening inside the auditorium. We weren’t in the lobby for 3 minutes before one of the greeters came over to give us a warm welcome. She was wearing her brightly colored “Ask Me” badge around her neck, and she had a very friendly smile, “Good morning, and who is this little guy” as she leaned a little too close to our baby’s face. She continued, “Is he walking yet?” Believing that she simply wanted to strike up conversation, we told her he had started walking a little over a month ago. Her eyes perked up, “Oh, wonderful! Well that means he would go do our ‘little walkers’ room. That’s where all the babies who can walk go. Let me show you.” My wife and I looked at each other and I ended up manning up, “I think we’d just like to keep him with us. Thank you though.” But with Terminator like persistence, she insisted we follow her to the room for babies. Eventually we went with her, so she got our way. We later agreed, if we had been first time guests, we would also have been last time guests.

If your preacher is Jesus’ mouth on Sunday morning, your welcomers are his handshake. It’s important to keep these volunteers focused on their task, which is to be helpful. And forceful is not helpful.

4. Unsafe Children’s Ministry. If you have kids you should already be aware of this. If you don’t have kids, you may need to become more aware of this. The worst possible experience for a first time guest is feeling uncertain for the safety of your children. In his book, Deep and Wide, Andy Stanley recounts an instance where he visited a church with his family. His description of the childcare was so unsettling that it’s no wonder him and his wife left in the middle of the service to collect their kids and leave. The last thing you want is for your guests to worry about the safety of their kids. Even if they stay until the end of the service, they’ll be distracted the whole time by that nagging feeling that their children are in an unsafe place.

These days, there are some amazing breakthroughs in children’s ministry safety. If you don’t have electronic check-in stations, maybe it’s time to think about looking into them. A lot of churches are also investing in security teams. These are background checked people who patrol the campus during your Sunday services to ensure that everything is safe for everyone. At my church, we call them ‘The Safe Team’, and I feel a whole lot more comfortable inviting my friends with children knowing that that team exists to keep people safe.

5. Unfun Children’s Ministry. A while back I took a Sunday off, and brought my family to visit another local church. My wife checked our 8 year old daughter, Scarlett,  into the 3rd grade classroom, and we attended the service. The church’s service was great. The stage design looked amazing, the music was totally my style, the preaching was compelling, the environments were warm and comfortable, the greeters were welcoming and helpful. The whole service experience was awesome. Afterward, I went back to the third grade classroom to pick up my daughter. I signed her out, and as we walked out I asked her if she had fun. She only had one thing to say about the morning,  “They gave candy to everyone who brought a Bible. I didn’t bring a Bible, so I didn’t get any candy.” Fortunately, Scarlett is a committed Christian. I’m pretty sure she loves Jesus more than I do. But looking at it from the perspective of a first time guest, it wasn’t good. Scarlett did not feel welcomed, and she certainly didn’t seem to have fun.

It’s important to remember that a lot of people use their kids as a kind of spiritual barometer. I have heard a lot of people say, “Yeah, we were thinking about church, so we came to check it out. Our kids loved it, which felt like a sign from God.” When it comes to guests, their children’s opinion carries great weight. That’s good news if you have a rockin’ children's program. It’s bad news if you only give candy to kids that are ‘in the Bible club’.

6. Ending services late. This one is a matter of respect. I tell this to my mentees all the time: you have to be respectful if you want to be respectable. When you challenge people to invite their friends, and then consistently end your services 10 or 15 minutes late, you’re directly contradicting yourself. You’re telling people that your church is the place for their friends to experience love, but you’re following it up by telling them you won’t respect them. Even if your church members don't worried about getting out on time, their friends very well might.

Always keep in mind that when someone invites a friend, one of the most commonly asked questions by the friend will be, “how long is the service.” Some people won’t be deterred when your church member fumbles in uncertainty trying to explain that its supposed to be an hour but it usually runs a little long. Other people are going to see that as a confirmation of what they thought - church still doesn’t sound like the place for me.

To Sum It Up

If you challenged your core members to fill one row of chairs for your next big service, would they trust you enough to do it? Sure, they have chosen to be regular attenders, but church people are a lot more forgiving than the unchurched. Your members speak the language. They’re part of the club. They’ve already bought into church. They trust you with their own spiritual growth, but it’s another thing entirely to trust you with their friendships. Doing that requires a whole new kind of vulnerability. It requires a different kind of trust. So let me ask you. When it comes to Sunday morning at your church, can your members trust you with their friends?

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