Quick Question. Did Jesus ever feel turned on?

He's easily among the most significant people of all time. Many think of him as a good teacher or a moral man, like Gandhi or Mother Theresa. But that's who he claimed to be. During his life on earth, Jesus made one thing abundantly clear - he claimed to be God.

Photo courtesy of Siebuhr at flickr.com

And the rest of the Bible agrees with him. The book of John calls Jesus by one of his nicknames, The Word. It says, "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God... and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us" (John 1:1 & 14). For Christians, the idea behind these verses is that Jesus Christ is simultaneously fully God, and fully man.

And it raises some interesting questions. Not long ago, during a mentoring meeting, a young man asked me this, "Did Jesus ever get a boner?" Which is a great question.

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The sex and waiting talk that my teenager said was awesome

These days, it's hard to teach kids and teens to hold off on exploring sex. Whether you think it's best for them to wait for marriage or you just want them to wait until they're ready, convincing your kids to keep their bodies to themselves comes with a lot of challenges. 

We live in a world were sex is idolized and advertised to young people. Even books and movies aimed at teens are packed with sex appeal. It makes the idea of waiting sound really lame to our kids. And parents also have to contend with their own worst enemy - themselves.

I've always struggled to find a good way to talk to my kids about waiting because... I didn't wait. I believe that the absolute best thing for them is to wait until they're married to have sex. But I feel really hypocritical about trying to convince them to do something I've never done.

Then last week I found myself in the middle of a conversation with my teenage daughter, Alura.  And while I typically write about lessons that come out of my failures, this one was a tic in the win column. Here's how everything went down. And before I begin, I want to invite you to leave your thoughts and criticisms in the comment section below (and obviously, I got Alura's permission to post this).

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The Man's guide to the best sex ever.

Teenage guys dream about sex the way little girls dream about having big weddings. They imagine it as often and as vividly as they can. Gross, I know. But most guys are just wired that way.

Photo courtesy of Thanh Tran at Flickr.com

We're designed to want sex the way many girls are designed to want to be cherished and loved. 

So then why do so many guys grow up, get married and struggle with unfulfilling sex lives?

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What do honorable husbands do about all the hot girls at the gym?

I keep meeting more and more men who really want to honor their girl friends and wives by not looking around at other women. But that can be challenging when the vast majority of girls go out of their way to dress to impress.

Photo courtesy of Jeanette Goodrich at Flickr.com

As I talk with and mentor some of these guys, the question that keeps coming up is How do I honor my girl when I'm at the gym? For guys, keeping their eyes pointed in the right direction isn't terribly difficult in most social situations. But keeping your eyes from coming across hot, spandex covered girls at the gym is like trying not to get shot on D-day at Normandy Beach (though the guys on Normandy actually stood a better chance than you). 

So what does an honorable man do? 

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How to help the addict in your life & the one thing needed to make change possible

All addicts ask themselves one question over and over again - How do I quit? It feels like it should be simple. If something is bad for you, just stop doing it. But addiction doesn't work like that. And many addicts will try anything and everything to quit, only to find themselves defeated and using again. And that's because being an addict is no different than having a chronic disease. It is a sickness that affects your decisions, and you can never completely get rid of it.

Photo courtesy of Juanjo Gutlerrez at Flickr.com

So then why are some addicts able to kick their addictions and maintain sobriety? What's different for them? Why do they get to live lives of freedom while so many others are living and dying with their addictions? The reason is simple. They have the one thing that is needed to kick any addiction. They have pain, and plenty of it. Let me explain.

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How to get your wife to have more sex with you

Guys typically get stereotyped as animals who think about sex almost all the time, which is fine since that's not entirely inaccurate for many of us. The truth is, sex is a high priority for a lot of men, which doesn't make us bad. However, we tend to get a bad wrap because of the methods we employ in seeking it out.

Photo courtesy of Anne Marthe Widvey at Flickr.com (CC)

You should probably get that checked out.
Some guys are aggressive, trying to convince their wives that it's their job to 'put out' for their husbands. Some others threaten their women by saying things like, "It's an instinct. If I don't get it fulfilled here I'm afraid I'll go looking for it somewhere else".

Then there are the passive guys. They're the ones who have tricked even themselves into believing that they're being loving when they say things like, "If you really loved me, you'd want to make me happy". And there are even those of us who are passive aggressive enough that we become emotionally withholding when women won't give us what we want.

And as you're likely aware, none of the above methods are very romantic. They rarely lead to sex, and when they do, it's never good. The truth is, these attitudes are born out of a desire for more sex. And as we already said, wanting more of it isn't bad. But if the pursuit of more sex leads us to any of the above behaviors or attitudes, then we're in trouble. And what we need to realize is that infrequent sex isn't the problem. It's only a symptom of the problem.

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